A Face To Go With The Voice

I met with Olga today, liking her immediately. She looks to be in her mid-thirties, fresh faced and slavic featured, with long sandy hair pulled up in a bun. I hate to sterotype, but she did fit my idea of a Russian stong woman--sturdy, earthy and very sweet. Tyoma liked her immediately and got on well with her two daughters. Olga and her partner have one birth daughter apiece with the same father. The girls were sweet, but I confess that the four year old was quite a handful. If she can deal with Lizzie, Tyoma will be a peice of cake. We set up a schedule for a few times a week, two hours a day. We have our fingers crossed!

Two More Days...

How will I enjoy my last hours of freedom while Tyoma is in daycare? By sitting on my backside and watching TV. I feel soooo tired. I should be organizing the basement (again), shopping, or doing something productive, but I'm pooped! Awww, well. NCIS rocks. Enjoy it!

When I dropped off the squirmy guy, I got the look from Miss Rhona. She hasn't seen me since the meeting ( tummy bug at the center)  and  she knew that I left in an unhappy place. Her  "are you going to be a bitch" look was met with my "No, but you effed up" look. Ahh, women and their subtle interactions!

Poor Olga

I skipped Kindercare today to bring Tyoma to meet Olga and her two children. At 8:00 in the morning she called. Her mother had dangerously high blood pressure and was in the hospital, could we meet another time?

She was so genuine and refreshingly un-dramatic in an absolutely  terrfying situation. My affection for her grew.  Who wants to trust a drama queen with their kid? I took Tyoma out for Chick-Fil-a and looked longingly at the spring clothes at the mall. My butt is in that in-between size where the "comfy" clothes are too loose and the skinny clothes are circulation destroying.

The Phonecall

So, Sunday I worked up the nerve to call the Russian babysitter.

Originally, Tennisfiend was going to call (the message was posted in Russian, afterall), but he didn't feel comfortable talking to her. I argued that I didn't feel comfortable calling either. Then we had a laugh. No wonder Tyoma has social delays!

I was so nervous!!! I even wrote out a little script for the whole conversation. The only thing I didn't plan to ask her was the color of her parachute!!! I called.  I felt anxious and excited, pacing with my well thought-out list of twenty questions. Heh. When we chatted, I heard anxiety and excitement in her voice, too.

I crossed out fifteen questions on principle. Two questions later, I set up an appointment to meet her this Wednesday. Sometimes, you get a feeling from someone, a simpatico thing. Yeah. I liked her already. One thing mildly surprised me. When she first mentioned her "partner" I didn't get that she was gay. It took three more mentions before I understood.

The mild surprise? That I didn't get it in the first place. Probably because to me, such things don't matter. Which is cool. Actually, super cool for Tyoma since he gets lots of female nurturing--two moms, two daughters and a grandma!

Farewell KinderCare

This will be our last week of KinderCare. Tyoma has been away from the center for three weeks and he is doing so well. I admit, I will miss the 12 hours of free time and I do wonder how I will cope with nonstop caretaking.

Without relatives to give a reprieve, will I perish from overwork or grind myself into depression? Naw. But I was grateful to family and KinderCare when I was ill with the flu. My feeblest efforts were not enough, and Tennisfiend had to work.

I guess that's why so many kids come to Kindercare sick. Other parents struggle, too. Tyoma seems so health and happy. This is the right decision. My only worry now is how to keep him interacting with other kids. He spazzes out at the public library. Story times don't hold his interest and he runs off. Crowded playgrounds make him cry. I will call the Russian babysitter with two young daughters and see what we can do. It's a start.

Fallout

I consulted Tyoma’s Educational Specialist from Early Intervention today regarding the parent/teacher meeting at KinderCare. We talked for a long time about Tyoma’s daycare and options for him. She said she was no advocate for institutional childcare and felt that Tyoma would benefit from a change in environment.

We agreed that an optional place for him would be where he would play with one or two other children. At our favorite Russian food store, ads have been posted for babysitting. I am going to check it out. After using up our balance at KinderCare I will take him out of the program. I put up with the non-stop sickness of daycare solely because our speech therapist said it was necessary for him to talk. Well, he’s yakking away, so fig to you KC!

Parent Teacher Conference

Tuesday, I had a meeting with Tyoma’s preschool teachers, Miss Rhoda and Ms. Sue (who had to leave early). I was very surprised by the developmental assessment that I was given, which showed very little improvement since the last meeting in November.

Although it was reported that he been interacting more, and showed improved listening, speaking, vocabulary and skills, the report did not match up with the verbal or written reports I was given when I picked him up from school. *deep breath* For example, Ms. Rhoda had reported that he was “nowhere near” forming friendships, when she had actually reported a friendship forming in our November meeting (the child turned three and was moved to another classroom).

Additionally, I have seen him playing alongside the same little girl more than once. I suspect that the winter holidays, in combination with illnesses (the teachers and Tyoma’s) have resulted in a lack of quality teacher/student interaction and thus the discrepancy between reports. Also they could be underpaid and overworked, or perhaps even dimwitted and inattentive. I am open to all possibilities.

Nevertheless, we were in complete agreement on a few important points. Both teachers agreed that Tyoma performs his best when only 2 or 3 students share the same space with him. Having taken Tyoma to many parks and play areas, I completely agree. So I am seriously considering taking him out of KinderCare. Why have him stuffed in a classroom with 12 students and two teachers when he does better with one teacher and two peers?

We can find something better for him. And you know, I’m pissed. How many times did I pick him up and hear accolades on his progress? How many half-assed communications did they send me telling me everything was wonderful? I agreed with their developmental assessment from three months ago. This one doesn’t ring true. WFT.

Another Week at Home

I called at Kindercare today and found out that they are still experiencing norvovirus. The director, who ignores me and works on her computer/shuffles papers when I am trying to communicate with her downplayed the outbreak.

She is a scruffy thing, thin with pale straw blonde hair, about 47, I imagine. If I stood next to her in line at the grocery store I wouldn't give her a second thought. She would be one of those faceless other people that buffer you all day long. However, on the phone, with a bit of authority in her, she takes on the greasy smoothness of bureaucrats with modest power--the woman at the DMV that would like for you take a number if there are only the two of you in the building. 

Anyway, no preschool for Tyoma this week. Last week went well. I missed my down time, but the payoff of having Tyoma (and the rest of us) well was awesome.