Since Grandma will be here next week I took Tyoma for his first haircut since Halloween (almost 5 months!!!). Over the summer I had him buzzed pretty regularly, but with his hat aversion, I kept his hair long over the winter months. We went to Snip-its, since the past few haircuts at JC Penney have been a trifle unfortunate.
Alas! I remembered why we went to JCP.
Reminiscent of Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Snip-its décor featured ultra-vivid colors and swirly, fanciful furniture. The kid-friendly videos they blasted out of their army of tiny suspended television sets even sounded like a hundred singing Ooompa-Loompas. No candy though. I reckon the place is perfect for the status-conscious six year old. Not so much for squirmy 2 1/2 year olds.
I wish you could have seen the look of horror on the stylist's face when I requested the televisions off and a private salon chair so Tyoma could sit on my lap as she cut his hair. Her expression was not quite as dramatically terrified as a person hurtling down the highest peak of a notorious rollercoaster, but it was certainly more appalled than a someone watching Hostel for the first time. Was I really that demanding and bossy? Or maybe other toddlers screamed to wake the dead, and she knew by my wild eyes that this was some serious business?
Anyway, I explained that Tyoma is gifted, but sensitive and that he will quickly get over the haircut process if he is distracted. Poor girl almost dropped her scissors when he stated to squirm, but I reassured her that I would tip generously. I reckon this was all she really needed to hear, because things went swimmingly after that. Spelling colors and numbers, Tyoma even relaxed enough to laugh and smile at her. She gave him a fabulous cut and I hope she will work with us in the future. Yay!
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Two More Days...
How will I enjoy my last hours of freedom while Tyoma is in daycare? By sitting on my backside and watching TV. I feel soooo tired. I should be organizing the basement (again), shopping, or doing something productive, but I'm pooped! Awww, well. NCIS rocks. Enjoy it!
When I dropped off the squirmy guy, I got the look from Miss Rhona. She hasn't seen me since the meeting ( tummy bug at the center) and she knew that I left in an unhappy place. Her "are you going to be a bitch" look was met with my "No, but you effed up" look. Ahh, women and their subtle interactions!
When I dropped off the squirmy guy, I got the look from Miss Rhona. She hasn't seen me since the meeting ( tummy bug at the center) and she knew that I left in an unhappy place. Her "are you going to be a bitch" look was met with my "No, but you effed up" look. Ahh, women and their subtle interactions!
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Poor Olga
I skipped Kindercare today to bring Tyoma to meet Olga and her two children. At 8:00 in the morning she called. Her mother had dangerously high blood pressure and was in the hospital, could we meet another time?
She was so genuine and refreshingly un-dramatic in an absolutely terrfying situation. My affection for her grew. Who wants to trust a drama queen with their kid? I took Tyoma out for Chick-Fil-a and looked longingly at the spring clothes at the mall. My butt is in that in-between size where the "comfy" clothes are too loose and the skinny clothes are circulation destroying.
She was so genuine and refreshingly un-dramatic in an absolutely terrfying situation. My affection for her grew. Who wants to trust a drama queen with their kid? I took Tyoma out for Chick-Fil-a and looked longingly at the spring clothes at the mall. My butt is in that in-between size where the "comfy" clothes are too loose and the skinny clothes are circulation destroying.
Monday, March 16, 2009
The Phonecall
So, Sunday I worked up the nerve to call the Russian babysitter.
Originally, Tennisfiend was going to call (the message was posted in Russian, afterall), but he didn't feel comfortable talking to her. I argued that I didn't feel comfortable calling either. Then we had a laugh. No wonder Tyoma has social delays!
I was so nervous!!! I even wrote out a little script for the whole conversation. The only thing I didn't plan to ask her was the color of her parachute!!! I called. I felt anxious and excited, pacing with my well thought-out list of twenty questions. Heh. When we chatted, I heard anxiety and excitement in her voice, too.
I crossed out fifteen questions on principle. Two questions later, I set up an appointment to meet her this Wednesday. Sometimes, you get a feeling from someone, a simpatico thing. Yeah. I liked her already. One thing mildly surprised me. When she first mentioned her "partner" I didn't get that she was gay. It took three more mentions before I understood.
The mild surprise? That I didn't get it in the first place. Probably because to me, such things don't matter. Which is cool. Actually, super cool for Tyoma since he gets lots of female nurturing--two moms, two daughters and a grandma!
Originally, Tennisfiend was going to call (the message was posted in Russian, afterall), but he didn't feel comfortable talking to her. I argued that I didn't feel comfortable calling either. Then we had a laugh. No wonder Tyoma has social delays!
I was so nervous!!! I even wrote out a little script for the whole conversation. The only thing I didn't plan to ask her was the color of her parachute!!! I called. I felt anxious and excited, pacing with my well thought-out list of twenty questions. Heh. When we chatted, I heard anxiety and excitement in her voice, too.
I crossed out fifteen questions on principle. Two questions later, I set up an appointment to meet her this Wednesday. Sometimes, you get a feeling from someone, a simpatico thing. Yeah. I liked her already. One thing mildly surprised me. When she first mentioned her "partner" I didn't get that she was gay. It took three more mentions before I understood.
The mild surprise? That I didn't get it in the first place. Probably because to me, such things don't matter. Which is cool. Actually, super cool for Tyoma since he gets lots of female nurturing--two moms, two daughters and a grandma!
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Farewell KinderCare
This will be our last week of KinderCare. Tyoma has been away from the center for three weeks and he is doing so well. I admit, I will miss the 12 hours of free time and I do wonder how I will cope with nonstop caretaking.
Without relatives to give a reprieve, will I perish from overwork or grind myself into depression? Naw. But I was grateful to family and KinderCare when I was ill with the flu. My feeblest efforts were not enough, and Tennisfiend had to work.
I guess that's why so many kids come to Kindercare sick. Other parents struggle, too. Tyoma seems so health and happy. This is the right decision. My only worry now is how to keep him interacting with other kids. He spazzes out at the public library. Story times don't hold his interest and he runs off. Crowded playgrounds make him cry. I will call the Russian babysitter with two young daughters and see what we can do. It's a start.
Without relatives to give a reprieve, will I perish from overwork or grind myself into depression? Naw. But I was grateful to family and KinderCare when I was ill with the flu. My feeblest efforts were not enough, and Tennisfiend had to work.
I guess that's why so many kids come to Kindercare sick. Other parents struggle, too. Tyoma seems so health and happy. This is the right decision. My only worry now is how to keep him interacting with other kids. He spazzes out at the public library. Story times don't hold his interest and he runs off. Crowded playgrounds make him cry. I will call the Russian babysitter with two young daughters and see what we can do. It's a start.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Meeting With Cheri
What a relief to meet with Cheri again! She’s an Early Childhood Educator who has a gifted son with Asperger’s Syndrome. Last fall, I called her for a consult when I was having problems with our speech therapist. Cheri was a breath of fresh air and a burst of positive energy. She observed Tyoma, connected with him (and me!) and declared that he while might be “different” he was still “okay.”
She gave me a ton of useful advice and tips, since he does have some autistic traits. Two weeks later he was talking. Hmmmm? Because of her? I suspect he followed his own internal schedule, but her attitude and encouragement helped me feel more relaxed and confident. Those two weeks felt like the blink of an eye.
Anyway, we had a long and fruitful meeting. She spent two hours with us in the morning, filling out the Hawaii Early Learning Profile used by her center. Tyoma was not only on his best behavior, but he brought out his reserve of extra cuteness to boot. We noshed on cinnamon rolls and sipped tea while the questions rolled on. At 11:30 she took off for another appointment and came back at 1:15 to finish up and generate a treatment plan. What dedication!
At the end of our marathon meeting she told me that Tyoma has very scattered skills and abilities that don't fit any particular profile in the autism spectrum. Much of his behavior is age-appropriate. Certain cognitive abilities are exceptionally advanced. And, of course he has little islands of strangeness. She said that nothing screams autism, but he is different enough to benefit from services—in particular she said that early help with socialization might help him avoid being the sort of nerdy kid that others will single out. He’s on the fence and whether or not he receives services is largely up to me.
So I say, sure! And we worked out a plan where she visits once every 4-6 weeks. Cool! I feel supported, less stressed and confident that our family is following the right path. Yay!!!
She gave me a ton of useful advice and tips, since he does have some autistic traits. Two weeks later he was talking. Hmmmm? Because of her? I suspect he followed his own internal schedule, but her attitude and encouragement helped me feel more relaxed and confident. Those two weeks felt like the blink of an eye.
Anyway, we had a long and fruitful meeting. She spent two hours with us in the morning, filling out the Hawaii Early Learning Profile used by her center. Tyoma was not only on his best behavior, but he brought out his reserve of extra cuteness to boot. We noshed on cinnamon rolls and sipped tea while the questions rolled on. At 11:30 she took off for another appointment and came back at 1:15 to finish up and generate a treatment plan. What dedication!
At the end of our marathon meeting she told me that Tyoma has very scattered skills and abilities that don't fit any particular profile in the autism spectrum. Much of his behavior is age-appropriate. Certain cognitive abilities are exceptionally advanced. And, of course he has little islands of strangeness. She said that nothing screams autism, but he is different enough to benefit from services—in particular she said that early help with socialization might help him avoid being the sort of nerdy kid that others will single out. He’s on the fence and whether or not he receives services is largely up to me.
So I say, sure! And we worked out a plan where she visits once every 4-6 weeks. Cool! I feel supported, less stressed and confident that our family is following the right path. Yay!!!
More Snow!!!
Yesterday it was in the sixties and lovely. I took the squirmy guy out to the park and we seemed to spend most of the day outside. Lovely weather! Then BAM! Snow again! Looks like eight inches at least. I told Tennisfiend that there's no way I'm shoveling the driveway for him today! Sheesh! Some really good news came in yesterday. Tyoma's speech therapist called and said that Tyoma is 100% caught up with his peers and no longer needs therapy! Yay!!!!
Sunday, March 8, 2009
The Pink Panther
About two weeks ago a remarkable thing happened. Tyoma actually found a cartoon to be hilariously funny. After months of Youtube, my sober young son laughed his butt off at this:
Since then, I've watched the clip about 1,000 times. He finds the scenes where PP scratches himself to be riotous. My mom decided that a plush Pink Panther would be da bomb and it arrived today. We opened the slightly bruised ups box together and he gasped when he found his very own Pink Panther. "Da Pingk Pandta!!! Ohhhh!" He's pictured here watching a PP DVD:
He obviously takes his comedy very seriously!
Since then, I've watched the clip about 1,000 times. He finds the scenes where PP scratches himself to be riotous. My mom decided that a plush Pink Panther would be da bomb and it arrived today. We opened the slightly bruised ups box together and he gasped when he found his very own Pink Panther. "Da Pingk Pandta!!! Ohhhh!" He's pictured here watching a PP DVD:
Saturday, March 7, 2009
No Pooping in the Bathtub!
We've been having problems with poo. It seems like Tyoma is going through a phase where poop is the most fascinating thing ever. Since Fontessa left, he has been getting into his soiled diaper during naptime/bedtime and smearing poo all over his crib, toys and wall. He used to knock on the wall ("poop-knocking")when he poopy. He even learned to yell, "Come get the poo!" The next step, obviously, in toilet training. Unfortunately, my focus shifted during Fontessa's wonderful visit and the momentum was lost. Phooey! Well, actually, "Pooo-ey!"
Each poop adventure has been a total shock. I can't believe he's doing this! Poo migrates into the tiniest crevices on his little body, deep under his nails, into folds of skin, behind his ears and into the creases of his nose. And his hair? Yes, there too.
He hates shampooing. Struggling with his poop-besmirched torso and limbs as I scrub his hair is no picnic for either of us. So I turned to the trusted forums of babycenter.com. It helps to read other parent’s exasperated “Poop Picasso” stories and learn that the consensus is “just a phase.” Destroying that solace are the autism Nazis, demanding that everyone have their child evaluated for persistent poo-players. Everybody has an opinion, you just have to pick out what seems right to you and give it a try.
One theory is that the warm bath following a poop excursion is a reward sought out by a child—cold showers, or cold “spritzes” are supposed to be a surefire cure. I don’t know--he hates having his hair washed. Why go through that ordeal when he can just ask for a bath?
So what to do? I decided to start giving him baths right after nap, whether or not there’s poo (removing that unlikely motive). Plus, I suit him up in a poop-suit (aka onsie) before naps. The results? The poop suit works. But he saves his poops for the tub.
Today is the third time in two weeks that he’s pooped in the tub. I am at my wits end. Bored with his bath, I sat on a stool next to the bath and played Tetris. Two minutes later, I looked up to see little brown submarines floating around. "Ewwwww! Poo!" Tyoma gleefully exclaimed. I had a "This can't be happening again" moment of unreality. Worst. Poop. In. Tub. Ever.
Taking a deep breath, I scornfully stated, “No pooping in the bathtub! Bath is over if you poop in the bathtub!” I snatched him out of the tub and Tennisfiend whisked him to his room for a cleanup.
Still stunned, I scooped out the soft warm poo with paper towels. I was surprised with my own revulsion. I've been wiping up poop for almost two and a half years, and this squicks me out?! Maybe in the context of diapers or fingerpainting it's just baby poop. But placidly bobbing in a warm bath, it's obscene. It's a bowel movement!
In the back ground, Tennisfiend echoed my "No pooping" quote. This obviously made an impression since Tyoma's been repeating the phrase to the Pink Panther over and over. He’s also been saying, “Poop artists get a cold shower. Poop knockers get candy” (another strategy). I’m hoping to get this behavior under control before mom comes. The last thing she needs is to get stuck with a poo painting session while I’m not around.
Each poop adventure has been a total shock. I can't believe he's doing this! Poo migrates into the tiniest crevices on his little body, deep under his nails, into folds of skin, behind his ears and into the creases of his nose. And his hair? Yes, there too.
He hates shampooing. Struggling with his poop-besmirched torso and limbs as I scrub his hair is no picnic for either of us. So I turned to the trusted forums of babycenter.com. It helps to read other parent’s exasperated “Poop Picasso” stories and learn that the consensus is “just a phase.” Destroying that solace are the autism Nazis, demanding that everyone have their child evaluated for persistent poo-players. Everybody has an opinion, you just have to pick out what seems right to you and give it a try.
One theory is that the warm bath following a poop excursion is a reward sought out by a child—cold showers, or cold “spritzes” are supposed to be a surefire cure. I don’t know--he hates having his hair washed. Why go through that ordeal when he can just ask for a bath?
So what to do? I decided to start giving him baths right after nap, whether or not there’s poo (removing that unlikely motive). Plus, I suit him up in a poop-suit (aka onsie) before naps. The results? The poop suit works. But he saves his poops for the tub.
Today is the third time in two weeks that he’s pooped in the tub. I am at my wits end. Bored with his bath, I sat on a stool next to the bath and played Tetris. Two minutes later, I looked up to see little brown submarines floating around. "Ewwwww! Poo!" Tyoma gleefully exclaimed. I had a "This can't be happening again" moment of unreality. Worst. Poop. In. Tub. Ever.
Taking a deep breath, I scornfully stated, “No pooping in the bathtub! Bath is over if you poop in the bathtub!” I snatched him out of the tub and Tennisfiend whisked him to his room for a cleanup.
Still stunned, I scooped out the soft warm poo with paper towels. I was surprised with my own revulsion. I've been wiping up poop for almost two and a half years, and this squicks me out?! Maybe in the context of diapers or fingerpainting it's just baby poop. But placidly bobbing in a warm bath, it's obscene. It's a bowel movement!
In the back ground, Tennisfiend echoed my "No pooping" quote. This obviously made an impression since Tyoma's been repeating the phrase to the Pink Panther over and over. He’s also been saying, “Poop artists get a cold shower. Poop knockers get candy” (another strategy). I’m hoping to get this behavior under control before mom comes. The last thing she needs is to get stuck with a poo painting session while I’m not around.
Friday, March 6, 2009
Tyoma and the Headband
Yay! Our new camcorder came in yesterday! This is what we got instead of a snowblower. Hope we have no regrets!!!
Thursday, March 5, 2009
Fallout
I consulted Tyoma’s Educational Specialist from Early Intervention today regarding the parent/teacher meeting at KinderCare. We talked for a long time about Tyoma’s daycare and options for him. She said she was no advocate for institutional childcare and felt that Tyoma would benefit from a change in environment.
We agreed that an optional place for him would be where he would play with one or two other children. At our favorite Russian food store, ads have been posted for babysitting. I am going to check it out. After using up our balance at KinderCare I will take him out of the program. I put up with the non-stop sickness of daycare solely because our speech therapist said it was necessary for him to talk. Well, he’s yakking away, so fig to you KC!
We agreed that an optional place for him would be where he would play with one or two other children. At our favorite Russian food store, ads have been posted for babysitting. I am going to check it out. After using up our balance at KinderCare I will take him out of the program. I put up with the non-stop sickness of daycare solely because our speech therapist said it was necessary for him to talk. Well, he’s yakking away, so fig to you KC!
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
Parent Teacher Conference
Tuesday, I had a meeting with Tyoma’s preschool teachers, Miss Rhoda and Ms. Sue (who had to leave early). I was very surprised by the developmental assessment that I was given, which showed very little improvement since the last meeting in November.
Although it was reported that he been interacting more, and showed improved listening, speaking, vocabulary and skills, the report did not match up with the verbal or written reports I was given when I picked him up from school. *deep breath* For example, Ms. Rhoda had reported that he was “nowhere near” forming friendships, when she had actually reported a friendship forming in our November meeting (the child turned three and was moved to another classroom).
Additionally, I have seen him playing alongside the same little girl more than once. I suspect that the winter holidays, in combination with illnesses (the teachers and Tyoma’s) have resulted in a lack of quality teacher/student interaction and thus the discrepancy between reports. Also they could be underpaid and overworked, or perhaps even dimwitted and inattentive. I am open to all possibilities.
Nevertheless, we were in complete agreement on a few important points. Both teachers agreed that Tyoma performs his best when only 2 or 3 students share the same space with him. Having taken Tyoma to many parks and play areas, I completely agree. So I am seriously considering taking him out of KinderCare. Why have him stuffed in a classroom with 12 students and two teachers when he does better with one teacher and two peers?
We can find something better for him. And you know, I’m pissed. How many times did I pick him up and hear accolades on his progress? How many half-assed communications did they send me telling me everything was wonderful? I agreed with their developmental assessment from three months ago. This one doesn’t ring true. WFT.
Although it was reported that he been interacting more, and showed improved listening, speaking, vocabulary and skills, the report did not match up with the verbal or written reports I was given when I picked him up from school. *deep breath* For example, Ms. Rhoda had reported that he was “nowhere near” forming friendships, when she had actually reported a friendship forming in our November meeting (the child turned three and was moved to another classroom).
Additionally, I have seen him playing alongside the same little girl more than once. I suspect that the winter holidays, in combination with illnesses (the teachers and Tyoma’s) have resulted in a lack of quality teacher/student interaction and thus the discrepancy between reports. Also they could be underpaid and overworked, or perhaps even dimwitted and inattentive. I am open to all possibilities.
Nevertheless, we were in complete agreement on a few important points. Both teachers agreed that Tyoma performs his best when only 2 or 3 students share the same space with him. Having taken Tyoma to many parks and play areas, I completely agree. So I am seriously considering taking him out of KinderCare. Why have him stuffed in a classroom with 12 students and two teachers when he does better with one teacher and two peers?
We can find something better for him. And you know, I’m pissed. How many times did I pick him up and hear accolades on his progress? How many half-assed communications did they send me telling me everything was wonderful? I agreed with their developmental assessment from three months ago. This one doesn’t ring true. WFT.
Monday, March 2, 2009
Another Week at Home
I called at Kindercare today and found out that they are still experiencing norvovirus. The director, who ignores me and works on her computer/shuffles papers when I am trying to communicate with her downplayed the outbreak.
She is a scruffy thing, thin with pale straw blonde hair, about 47, I imagine. If I stood next to her in line at the grocery store I wouldn't give her a second thought. She would be one of those faceless other people that buffer you all day long. However, on the phone, with a bit of authority in her, she takes on the greasy smoothness of bureaucrats with modest power--the woman at the DMV that would like for you take a number if there are only the two of you in the building.
Anyway, no preschool for Tyoma this week. Last week went well. I missed my down time, but the payoff of having Tyoma (and the rest of us) well was awesome.
She is a scruffy thing, thin with pale straw blonde hair, about 47, I imagine. If I stood next to her in line at the grocery store I wouldn't give her a second thought. She would be one of those faceless other people that buffer you all day long. However, on the phone, with a bit of authority in her, she takes on the greasy smoothness of bureaucrats with modest power--the woman at the DMV that would like for you take a number if there are only the two of you in the building.
Anyway, no preschool for Tyoma this week. Last week went well. I missed my down time, but the payoff of having Tyoma (and the rest of us) well was awesome.
OMG, SNOW!!!
I just shoveled 195 cubic feet of snow. Gasp.
We are the only people on the street without a snow blower. We were planning to get one, but decided to wait until the end of the season sale. Hah! Near the road, the snow was above my knees and heavy as cement. It's wetter than the sweet, fluffy flakes near the garage. As I labored, the wind blew sheets of the stuff right to our doorstep, whisking shovelfulls back into my face during gusts as I dug.
Still love it here!
Still love it here!
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