Breakfast With Ashleigh

Well, I plan to make 2011 the year of the friend.  I made a promise to myself to keep in touch with the people I love most and to try to do something social at least once every six weeks. Whoo! Let's see if my lame self can do this consistently.

Today, I went to breakfast with Ashleigh, a mother on one of Tyoma's classmates.  Two weeks ago on our first breakfast, I spazzed out, not knowing what to talk about.  I have a terrible habit of bombarding people with questions in social situations.  I do this because I just don't know what to say. Specifically, I quiz people to find something entertaining to talk about. I'm pragmatic about conversations and particular about what I find interesting in a person. I interrogate people at parties to find a mutual link, so I can relax and chat authentically.

This strategy flatters some, especially folks who have a grand passion lurking.  I feed off the positive energy of an eager speaker, and if we like the same thing, nothing else matters. Unfortunately, many are put off my intensity, give me the "Bitch, please" look and edge away. At a recent Twilight party, a girl physically scooted her chair from me, as if she feared I would grab her by the shoulders and shake her, asking, "Do you like rocks? Plants? How about zombies? Everybody likes zombies!" I think she needed more wine.

I really don't do well with small talk, except for the memorized pleasantries I exchange with cashiers and people I'm stuck in line with.  I remain intentionally uninformed on politics and sports, probably because the topics intimidate me.  I prefer conversations about odd or specific hobbies.  I relish strange details and vivid discussions. When I go home after my 90 social minutes, I want to ponder curious pursuits and why people crave them.

I avoid well-liked fiction like Twilight and Harry Potter, perhaps out of reactive stubbornness to their popularity. Instead,  I  prefer morbid horror and literature dealing with death, anxiety and depression.  Since my own strange ruminations focused on these topics for years, it is a logical preference.  I do like other fictions- magical realism and writing that is odd and open to interpretation.  I seek out descriptive and atmospheric pieces that create an internal visual trip. I feel so alien in this world that visiting a tense, ambiguous world validates my experiences in this one..

Anyway, I had breakfast with Ashleigh, a Twilight  and TV fan. We met last year dropping off our autistic sons for preschool. She is instantly likeable, the sort of person who dresses for comfort and loves to read books. Her loving and genuine acceptance of her son, just as he is, wins my respect and affection. I've been to her Twilight parties and cracked inappropriate jokes during screenings and met other girls who dress comfortably and like to read.

So we had our first breakfast get together a few weeks ago.  I probably have made her uncomfortable with my spazzed out interrogation and overall twitchiness.  Today, I managed to find just the right questions to ask, and we had a pleasant conversation. I suspect that we both construct worlds in our heads--I went through my vampire phase in 1991 (thank you Francis Ford Coppola!).

An interesting note.  I had posted on Facebook that I had not read any Harry Potter books in response to a list of books Ashleigh had posted. For my birthday, she bought the first Harry Potter book for me. It was unthinkable to her that a civilized person had not read one. I was touched by her  sweet and thoughtful gesture. She also packed up her  collection of sequels for me to borrow, since I was sure to love Potter.  Awwww.

I was gracious, but already anxious. How on earth am I to read fantasy? I couldn't make it through one novel of Lord of the Rings, let alone seven volumes of popular fantasy. I will give it a try, maybe I will like it. After all, Allan Rickman was in those Potter movies, right?

Nukestock 2007!

Yay! It will take me some time to get all the pics up and insert text, but here we go:
 



 

Nukestock Begins...

Erhm, yes this photo is from Friday night, but the skeleton sweethearts in their seashell looked so precious, I just had to show them off!


I dashed off to the premier night of Nukestock seconds after I put baby down. The first night, traditionally the beer and wine tasting night, promised to be filled with delectable goodies, so I was very anxious to start sampling. Ewbliette and Brotherkurt’s table was every bit as impressive as I hoped.

A colossal assortment of exotic beer was the centerpiece, flanked by tons and tons of CHEESE! I came for the cheese! Gouda, Stilton, flavored havartis, jarlesburg, aged cheddars, nameless varieties marbled with greens and blues, cheese with nuts, cheese with fruit, and cheese with herbs! Ahh sweet paradise! AND hard sausages! I counted two varieties, but suspect I overlooked a third since one of their sausages was so delicious that I had eyes only for it!

The pair of them must have put this party together just for me! Due to my diet, I passed on the crackers and bread, which ranged from delicate and sophisticated to simple and earthy. I forgot my diet when Ewbliette brought out the gourmet chocolate squares and muffins. It was very difficult not to make a hog of myself!

Despite my gourmandizing, I managed to survive on a glass of wine and no beer. My evening was once again a short one, primarily so I could enjoy a longer time out tomorrow. Getting up early with Tyoma doesn’t lend itself to late evenings.

Anyway, I did actually spend some time not stuffing my face. I chatted with Raz, who demurely sipped on samples of various beers two tablespoons at a time. She was one of about four people who seemed to take the beer tasting aspect of the party seriously. Tkil and deliriumdreams were also in attendance, so I had a chance to gab with them as well. The house was just beginning to fill up as I left. Alas!

Congratulations Food4Thoth!

Congratulations Food4Thoth and wife! The pair had a Lucky 13th Anniversary Party tonight that I briefly attended. What a lovely home! Pat and I arrived after dark, so I did not get a good look at the outside of their place, but it certainly seemed expansive.

Inside, Thoth and spouse put in an incredible kitchen and tiled floors--the kitchen cabinets were to die for! Their home looked like Southwestern bed and breakfast you'd see in a magazine. Classy! I visited with Rodeyo and Raz, and sipped a half a glass of wine while making friends with Lonnie, who brought her brand new Nikon MD80 to the party.

She worked at Southwest Counseling before moving to a youth program at FYI. We talked shop and camera gear. Thoth brought out an ooooold picture of the two of us from an Oingo Boingo concert in the 80's. Wearing black lipstick, he looked very pretty, some of the guests mistook him for a girl! It's hard to believe that all this fun was stuffed into about 90 minutes! I wore out early, but sweet Ewbliette took me back to her place (for my car). Last thing I heard, folks were gearing up for the hot tub.

Labor Day with Patricia

Yay! Ewbliette had today off ! We had a chance to hang out and it was really sweet!

We started off around eleven (she slept in till ten!), with some Tyoma time. We're prepping for my Cali trip, she's going to give Mom a little break during the weekend we'll be gone. I know Grandma and Grandpa love the little one, but he can really wear a person out!

I made us coffees and we gabbed until Mom arrived. We decided on lunch at Chiles, and celebrated with a fried cheese (Good Lord!) and identical main courses (Chicken Loose Bowel Wraps). I usually love the ribs, but after my Outback Upchuck*, I decided to pass.

After lunch, we dashed over to Barnes and Nobel, where I resolved not to buy anything. We had a blast clothes shopping for Ewbliett, who picked up a gaggle of cute outfits for work. I can tell you one reason we are such good buds--we both shop the same way. When it comes to clothes, we are very pragmatic and sensible. When it comes to books, the weirder, the better!

At the last minute, I wound up recruiting Ewbliette as an emergency babysitter for tomorrow evening. Tennisfiend's old professor from Moscow State University will be in town tomorrow, and since he is a friend of the family, all of us will be dining at La Posta tomorrow. Bless her for stepping up!



  * Both Mom and I felt sick after our meal at the Outback Steakhouse. I tossed my cookies a few hours after dinner. Ewbliette said that a girlfiend can't eat their ribs due to the amount of MSG in them. Huhn!

Outback With My Birth Partners

 Yesterday evening I took Momfiend and out for dinner at the Outback Steakhouse. If you'll notice, Momfiend has a can of bear-spray with her. Upon seeing the photo, a shocked exclaimed, "Was your mom worried about being mugged in the parking lot?!" No, actually, Mom said that she "brought the bearspray since we were going to the Outback." Hee! Mom, you so crazy!

The three us us had a marvelous time. We should meet every year to celebrate our work together in bringing Tyoma into the world. Ewbliette and I asked Mom to tell her birth story repeatedly, but we kept getting sidetracked. Maybe we'll keep meeting just so Mom can finish her story! I am so grateful to my girls for being there for me. Till those labor pains rock your bones, you don't realize just how much you need the ones you love! Much thanks to Mom's sturdy arms that held firm my flailing leg and much thanks to Ewbliette's indefatigable vocal cords that kept me pushing 1-2-3, 4-5-6, 7-8-9! I love you guys!

Snark?

 

Zonked Out

I was a big ole party pooper tonight. After shamelessly inviting myself to Ewbliette’s Friday night, I showed up, drank a glass of wine, gabbed halfheartedly and whizzed home. Earlier, I was so psyched to get out! I pretty much tossed the baby in the crib with one hand while picking up the car keys with the other. 

But the hot drive over made me drowsy, despite the blasting AC and blaring radio. After I arrived, I flopped down on the couch next to an overworked and exhausted Rodeyo. We mindlessly watched a re-run of Shrek on TBS, feeling sleepier by the second. Chuck joined us a few minutes later, enviably chipper. He sat between Rodeyo and me, making pleasant conversation. I perked up when I recognized that his manner of speaking was oddly familiar. He spoke with an uncommon clipped precision. His words were distinctly enunciated (especially the t’s and s’s) and the cadence of his speech strongly resembled--Crispin Glover! Joy!

I’ve run into Chuck about a half dozen times, but this was the first time that I really noticed him. A quiet, bespectacled member of the high IQ crowd (150), Chuck has genuine amber eyes that coordinate unexpectedly with his orange hair, which he wears braided tightly to the nape of his neck. He is lanky, mustachioed and dresses conservatively in chinos and a worn button-down shirts. Upon realizing that I was scrutinizing him, he became embarrassed and flustered. I quickly noted that his ancestors could have been Vikings, and politely moved my focus to the lovely glass of wine Ewbliette brought me.

With wine bottle in hand, Ewbliette and I retired to the back porch. She discussed her work as an accountant at NMSU, including the impending close of the fiscal year, complete with associated deadlines and psychotic co-worker reactions. Naturally, her work has been outrageously draining, and included several hours of additional work earlier this morning and afternoon. Poor tired girl!

Me, well, I was sooo zonked. The baby is teething and I am coping with the psychological effects the dual loss of our television (broken!) and my computer (Tennisfiend decided to host his Russian DVD festival on my computer)! Usually the hub of great conviviality, the back porch turned into a scene from Shaun of the Dead.

So, Ewbliette looked at me and I looked at her and we simultaneously decided to get together later, when we had more energy. Sometimes you just need to breathe the same air as your best friend and then go home and sleep. Ironically, we both perked up as she walked me to my truck, chatting amiably for several minutes. The subject of Chuck came up. She said “You know what surprised me about him? He’s only 21 years old!” To which I replied, “Whaa?!” Maybe it’s the mustache or slightly receding hairline, but I would have sworn he was in his early thirties. Whoa.

Wedding Reception!!!

"Tee-hee! Photos are silly!"
Whee! Congrats and !!!! More pics and text to follow!
will kill me, since I went for the goofy pic. Forgive me, dude, but you look adorable! Ewbliette and Brotherkurt's reception was a blast! Tennisfiend and I started early with a mid-afternoon visit to show off monster baby. Tkil and Nirikrss were hanging out in the living room, drinking some fine stout and gabbing. TF sat silently,his usual reticent self, while Tkil talked camera tech with me (my brain still feels tiny!). After Ewbliette and Brotherkurt showed off their cake, we took off, ostensibly since baby was fussy, but truthfully since TF is really introverted!
The delicious coconut wedding cake. I must add that the spread of goodies the happy couple put together for their guests was stupendous! A half a vineyard edged the buffet in the dinning room. Beer enough for an Oktoberfest was lined up in coolers in the back yard. And the food! Good Lord! I think I was too focused on the wine to remember... Oh yes, there was food! Ummmm. Chips and, err, BBQ pulled pork sandwiches!!! And, of course yummy wedding cake!
Nirikrss and his Greyhound Escorts. Three of the sweetest doggies ever!
 As we left, Nirikrss took his three lovely greyhounds for a walk in the park adjacent to the Brotherkurt household. I had a chance to visit with his puppies later in the evening, feeding them doggie biscuits I took along for them. BTW, Nirikrss has the thickest, orangest hair I've ever seen!

Oooo-veedimsa Skora! (We'll be seeing you soon!)

 Tennisfiend’s mom flew out to Philadelphia for a week of fun with an old girlfriend. The following week, she'll return to Moscow. So I must keep several things just as she left them for good luck (my own neurotic superstition).

We'll be seeing her again soon, her next scheduled visit is in early fall. While TF drove Fontessa to El Paso International, I met with my folks and their best friends who were in town for the day. The short restaurant stop didn’t induce any baby crying and I had a chance to check out some lovely wedding pictures of their daughter's wedding ceremony. I spent the balance of the day washing sheets and rotating bed linens so I could return to my old digs. The air mattress was comfy enough, but never underestimate the joy of having a bedroom door to close. The house seemed so quiet today, even with the baby making his usual racket.

Family Outing

 Here we all are at Veteran's Park. Picture courtesy of Papa Yuri and son A.K.

From the center, left: Tyoma, Tennisfiend, Bestfiend, Papa Yuri, Mama Irina, Dadfiend, Momfiend and A.K.

Anyway, here's our little story. Since A.K's folks were in from Moscow at the same time as TF's mom, we were planning on having a giant multi-national jamboree at our house. Unfortunately, poor A.K. came down with his first flu in six years and was totally wiped out.

At the last minute, he suggested that we all meet at the park to protect baby from the flu and still say howdy. The party was set for 12:30, but I planned to meet my folks thirty minutes earlier to ease Tyoma into a new situation with minimal fussiness. New stuff=insane crying jag.

As fate would have it, A.K. and his folks were traveling near the park at about the same time I was. They saw my unmistakably familiar truck (it once belonged to A.K!) and pulled into the park. A.K. and I dashed out to meet each other, both wondering if we had mistaken the proper meeting time. Then my folks showed up! Despite the confusion, we sorted things out and the K family made a quick trip home to pic up camara gear and goodies.

Papa and Mama K gave Tyoma a traditional silver spoon for teething along with a teething toy. Papa Yuri explained how the spoon should be left in baby's water to "purify" it. This quaint custom actually has some medicinal basis since silver solutions are effective and gentle anti-microbials. Anyway, no one brought any vodka or caviar, but we all enjoyed bottled water, including Tyoma who sipped it from the plastic cap. Yay!

Chocolate Martini Headache

Went to see my girl Ewbliette tonight. The boys were playing a game based on the movie The House on Haunted Hill  that one of them had developed.

It was pretty cool, each player builds a section of the house as the game progresses. I rattled on about Famke Jansen and old movies, to anyone who would listen, missing my buddy Ger, a fellow movie nerd.

Anyway, Brotherkurt made me a total of  two sinfully delicious chocolate martinis (my limit!) during the evening. I came home with the worst headeache evah. Blah.

Dinner and Drinks with A & I

I treated myself to a cut and style with Rodeo today since I've been feeling so stressed out. He really brightened my day with his outrageous observations and hilarious jokes. All I needed was a reflexology foot massage by Ewbliette!

On the way home, I dropped by the store to pick  up goodies to bring over to the housewarming party A & I would have tonight. I felt very pretty.

"A" was the best man at our wedding a zillion years ago and "I" is his Russian girlfriend of six years. They moved to an upscale apartment complex at the end of last month and have been lavishing attention on their new home by way of new furniture and linens.

Their place was tastefully decorated in a sleek, modern style. Although "I" would cringe at my description, it looked very Ikea to me (she considers Ikea to be "too middle class"). I like their style very much, and I'm not ashamed to be an Ikea patron. Heck, if it looks cool, I'll buy it at Target, K-Mart or Walmart.  I save my money for books!

Anyway...I loved their apartment and classy furniture. "I" fixed us a simple but delicious meal and served it on elegant tableware. We relaxed with drinks afterward, while "A" showed us a scrapbook he had made to celebrate the years he and "I" have had together. I was truly impressed with the effort he put into the project. I was initially under the impression that all of the intricate cut-outs and decals were made on his computer and hand etched by him until he explained that he bought them at Hobby Lobby. On the way home that night, Tennisfiend observed that if they had a child, they would have little time for such pursuits. We laughed the way many parents before us have laughed at those without children (or dogs!).

Pool Party

Yesterday’s pool party was great fun, but the day leading up to it was hectic. First, our ancient swamp cooler began to dump water onto the roof. I hauled out the ladder and trotted up to adjust a cooling panel dislocated by the wind. Twenty minutes later, more water. Apparently when I re-positioned the panel, I knocked the water-regulating float out of alignment. Few things are more hateful than adjusting that damn float. During the lunch hour, our digital cable was installed. At last, will be able to watch real matches on the Tennis Channel instead of observing flickering numbers on an Internet scoreboard. Later in the afternoon, I returned home to discover water festively sprinkling Misty’s digging compound. A hose to the swamp cooler had sprung a multitude of tiny leaks. Good thing I left the ladder up. Anyway, it was delightful to have company. The weather was mercifully cool and pleasant. Baked appetizers worked better than a cookout. Our swamp cooler did not plunge off the roof and squash anyone. Whew. My only regret was that our extemporaneous guest of honor, Mukor, was too ill to attend. We consoled ourselves by sailing Misty around the pool in a Spring Float Recliner In a post-swim discussion about The Nightmare Before Christmas, Ewbliette mentioned that Jack Skellington seemed very spider-like to her. Since we are both arachnophobes, I wondered why this resemblance did not disturb us more. My theory--dark spiders are scary and evil, pastel spiders are benevolent and sweet. Would I hunt down pink widow spiders with the same zeal as their ebon sisters? I wonder. This theory clearly deserves meaningful expansion, alas I am too tired.